This message was originally written in the body of an email to Trisha from Crazy Little Thing Called Life. If you aren't familiar with her blog, you should check it out because she is great! I asked her a few questions about her journey and she wrote me back a long, detailed email that was awesome. Anyway, I went off on a tangent and rather than sending it to her, I decided to share it with everyone. So, here goes nothing...
I am not sure if you know this or not, but I lost 75 pounds about 4 years ago and was only able to keep it off for about a year. I went to Italy and ate an endless amount of pasta, pizza, wine and gelato. I only gained 10 lbs in Italy over 6 months, but when I came home I gained about 60 pounds over the course of 2 years. YIKES! So, I am not completely new to this, except for this time I am really trying to do it right. Last time I feel like I was doing the motions, but not the hard work. I didn't develop a new relationship with food and my habits, I just repressed them. I would have a successful weigh in with my dietician and I would drive over to Wendy's and order greasy fattening food to "congratulate myself." It was a journey of deprivation not a journey of changed habits. This time I still have cravings and still find myself longing for things, but I allow myself to enjoy things from time to time in moderation. It is not always easy. I spent the night last night laying in bed literally salivating while I was thinking about eating cheesburgers, fries and pasta. It makes me feel terrible and guilty. It reminds me that I have a long way to go, but it also reminds me of how far I have come. In the past when the craving would sink in I would find a way to satisfy my urge no matter what. This time I laid there for a solid 10 minutes dreaming of these carb and fat loaded foods, but then I reminded myself of my progress. I said to myself, "Shannon, what is the point of going to Wendy's right now and ordering all of the food you're craving, coming home, eating it all and then going to bed?" What positive thing could possibly come from this? The answer is simple. There is nothing good about eating Wendy's at 10:00 at night when you have worked your butt off to get where you are AND keep in mind missy that you have a LONG way to go.
This is me sharing an example of how it is not always easy. I am not trying to be a complainer, or whine about how hard it is to not eat a cheeseburger. I just think that we all struggle at different times and with different things. Last nights Wendy's craving almost got to me. I admit it. I was close to a breaking point, but I overcame it. Somehow, with some willpower that I found within myself to say, "You don't need that go to sleep." I just wanted to share this for anyone who has ever had a craving, a bad day or a bad week that turned into a month that you should stick to it. If you fell off the wagon get back on it. The one thing that I have learned is that it really is never too late to kick this thing once and for all.
This is an amazing post! I, have fell off the wagon NUMEROUS times. Mainly because Taco Bell is my all time fave, and right on the corner of my street. Great! But I talk myself down, and either end up eating there, but eating off the "Fresco" menu or just driving right on past and going home. I don't think you were complaining at all!! You were stating that you are human, who loves a good cheese burger. I think I am slightly man-ish because, damn what I would do for a big fat chili cheese dog!! (sorry my email was so long, once I get to typing I just ramble on and on and on.. lol) ((And thanks for the shout out!!))
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate to this - I've always used food as my reward, and I've definitely experienced the feeling that it's not just a craving but something I absolutely need. With time, though, it does get easier - what really helped me was finding ways to reward myself or relax without using food.
ReplyDeleteI have been there. Sometimes I do give in - but I have to be careful that it is only 1 meal.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your story. I let food become a reward when feeling good and being healthy should be what I strive for.
ReplyDeleteYou should feel zero guilt just because you are thinking of cheeseburgers and fries; those are only thoughts and I can tell you, even though I've been at maintenance for a long time, there isn't a single day that goes by when I don't crave sugar (as in donuts, brownies and cookies). Not one day. Some days are tougher than others but working through it means you had a huge success - HUGE! If I were you, I'd rate your craving from that night. If it was let's say, an 8 out of 10 (10 being the worst craving ever) then compare future cravings to that one. Say to yourself: hey, I talked myself out of an 8, so I can talk myself out of this one, too. Sometimes that works for me.
ReplyDeleteThat's an awesome post!! Thank you so much for sharing!! :)
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