Worst time of the day



I am not a morning person, so you would probably think that the worst time of the day for me would be 6:00 a.m. when my alarm goes off.  While that is true, the worst time of the day for me is by far the evening after work.  Monday through Friday 8-4:30 I am the queen of healthy eating.  I avoid bad foods at work all day, I make sure I eat my healthy meals and snacks and I drink a ton of water.  When the clock strikes 5:00 and I am almost home it is like a switch turns on. 

There are advertisements on the radio for food.

There is a basket of candy for treak or treaters at my house.

There is a bag of nacho cheese doritos in my cupboard.

There is a coupon for chinese food in my mailbox.

There is my brain telling me that one night of deliciousness can't really be that bad...

So what did I do?  Radio turned off.  Basket of candy put on a high shelf out of sight.  Doritios doused in water and vinegar and thrown away.  Coupon straight into the shredder.  Open up my computer and read some weight loss articles and success stories to remind my brain what the goal is.

Dramatic?  Not really.  It may seem to an outsider that I should just be able to avoid it all, but I am not there right now.  I am at the point where I have to get it away from me or else I will convince myself that one night off track is okay.  I have to get it away from me to reach my goal.  I have to keep going with my 8-4:30 in order to make this weight loss a success.  Does anyone else struggle with this?  Does anyone else have to remove temptation from right under their nose for fear that they will eat an entire basket of candy or bag of chips?  It drives me crazy.  I am happy that I am working through some of these issues with a counselor and I hope that one day soon I can have those things around me and eat them in moderation or avoid them completely, but I am just not there right now.

Right now it is 8:33 a.m. and I am eating a banana and oatmeal and it feels as though the world is my oyster.  I feel like I can accomplish anything.  Like I can resist all temptation.  I plan to ride this feeling out and hope that when 5:00 strikes I am one day closer to kicking these feelings to the curb.

What Keeps You on Track?

You know that feeling that you get when a craving kicks in.  When you are hungry and your stomach is growling.  You are in a rush and you need to make a decision about food.  Your head may say, get a donut.  It might also say get a McDonald's breakfast sandwich.  Well, this morning donuts and sausage biscuit sandwiches tempted me.  They called out my name and said, just do it... you can always get back on track later.  FALSE.

Some days our willpower is stronger than others.  Today, mine was a brick wall, no one was ruining my healthy plan.  I walked right past the donuts and drove right past two McDonald's.  I didn't even look back once.  So, my question is, "what keeps you on track."  When you want to derail and succumb to your craving what is something that picks you up and keeps you focused and on track?

For me, I stay focused for a lot of reasons.  The first one, because it is the closest is because I am going to Florida in two months.  Swimsuits, dresses and shorts.  Airplanes (yuck), amusement parks and swimming pools.  I want to look better in my pictures this year than I did last year in Hawaii.  More than that I want to feel better than I did last year.  Next thing, I have five weddings to go to this year.  I want to look great in the outfits that I wear and feel comfortable.

One of the major reasons is because I know one year from now I will be trying on wedding dresses.  I want to look and feel my best.  My sister and several other brides that I know have said, "I wish I would have pushed my self to be as healthy as I could be in my wedding dress."  I know people have had to get gowns that they didn't want to because they weren't at their comfortable weight.  I don't want to have that problem.

One of the last things that keeps me on track is other people noticing that I am losing weight, complimenting me or telling me that I have inspired them in some way.  Yesterday, one of my co-workers wrote to me and said,

"I don’t know why or how it finally happened where I finally couldn’t stand what I was doing to myself, but it happened.  I am more focused than I have ever been and I just wanted to thank you for being inspirational in my journey to good health.  We work in a bldg with food everywhere, and it is worse for you, because you are like 50 feet away from it.  I admire your willpower, strength and determination to do this, despite all the obstacles.  It will make you an even stronger person in the long run, it just kind of stinks right now.  Feel free to call me to be there for you whenever you feel down and “emotionally hungry”.  I have a little note on my computer “If hunger is not the problem, food is not the solution”.  And since food hasn’t helped that so far, I’m trying something different this time."

I was very touched by this.  Someone that I work with noticed my actions and was able to positively change something in her life as a result.  It is the ultimate pay it forward.  This is the kind of kind words that keeps me motivated.  When you think that it is not just about you, but that someone else looks up to you or notices your hard work you want to continue on even more.  I have never been more motivated in my life.  I have my friends and family supporting me.  I have co-workers who admire me and my willpower.  I also have all of you following the ups and downs and keeping me in check.

So, today you should tell someone that you admire them.  That you are motivated by their actions and determined to live the healthy lifestyle that the are striving for.  You just may say the words that keeps them on track and helps them with a roadblock on their journey!  :)

Saturday Session is once again tardy

So my two goals from last week were pretty simple.  They were...

1. Stay on track, keep my eye on the prize.

I did a decent enough job with this one.  I didn't see a gain this week, but I also didn't see a loss.  I maintained, which is okay with me for this week because I already told all of you that I ate more than usual and had a few glasses of wine.  I didn't really track this last week, which was probably why I didn't see the big deal in eating just one small oreo truffle.  I am going to carry over the tracking piece into next week's SS because I think I have somehow told myself that I can do this without tracking and I think that is a mistake.

2. Relax.

I actually did pretty well with this one.  I know some of you may be thinking, how hard can it be to just relax?  Well for me it can be a big problem. I tend to over-plan and over-think everything and then I just stress myself out.  I can honestly say that this is one of the first holiday's in awhile that I have just enjoyed and not thought about making everything perfect.

New Goals...

1. Track my food all week. 

This means every morsel.  I want to get back on the tracking wagon because I really, really think that it helps me and I know that I eat more than I should when I am not diligent about writing everything that I eat down.  So, having said that I am going to be a tracking machine this week and see if my weigh-in proves that this method is indeed neccesary for me.

2. Set some major goals and challenges for the New Year.

This upcoming SS happens to land on the first day of the New Year, so to kick off the New Year with a big bang I am going to reveal my major goals for the year, some challenges that I am kind of afraid of, but willing to tackle and some of my hopes and aspirations for this journey in the new year.  I hope you all will take some time to reflect on your journey so far and take some notes on where you would like to be in the New Year.  Let's make 2011 healthier and happier than ever!! :)

Posts that are yet to come this week include: the Hate-Loss challenge, a fashion related post, a post about the website Etsy, a review of the game Just Dance 2 for the Wii and a new SS post!  Make it a great week everyone!

Satunday Session

I hope everyone had a happy holiday weekend.  Over here in Minnesota we were snow free (yea!) this weekend and we made it to almost all of our holiday events. On friday Ron and I braved Mall of America to finish our Christmas shopping (we only have two people left) out of probably 20 people so we did pretty good.


Yesterday we had our family Christmas party with my extended family on my mom's side.  I love this holiday party. It includes about 40-50 of us getting together at my cousins house and we have an appetizer and dessert contest.  It is so much fun and everyone really tries to make a fabulous dish.  This year I made.... 


To Die For Dip:
2 - 8 oz. Pkgs. Philadelphia Cream Cheese
1 – Can (~15oz.) Whole Corn (drained)
1 – Can (~4 oz.) Chopped Olives
1 – Packet of Dry Hidden Valley Ranch Seasoning & Salad Dressing Mix
Chopped Pickled Jalapenos to your tolerance
1 red pepper chopped
1 can black beans


Mix all ingredients together and serve cold or warm in a crock pot with fritos or tortilla chips.


AND...


Double Chocolate Kiss Cookies

I added chocolate chips to the dough and made my own vanilla buttercream frosting.


So, how did it go?  I WON 1st place for the cookies!!!  People loved them.  I have to admit, I didn't eat one.  I didn't eat much besides fruit and veggies at the party and one meatball and a little dip.  It went pretty well considering how much temptation was there.


Last night I had another Christmas party to go to and I went to it and there was another table of food and tons of libations and I only ate two things.  Success in my eyes.  I also worked out on Saturday for the first time (biking) and my ankle did really well.  I am so excited to get back into my routine though.


Today, I had a holiday concert to go to but was unable to go due to a family emergency.  Everything is fine now, but I am happy that I was able to be there for my family.


The rest of my week goes, something like this...


Sunday- Finish wrapping presents, clean my house, finish making truffles
Monday- Work, Ornament exchange at lunch, working out, preparing house for Girl's Night Christmas 
Tuesday- Work, Girl's Night Christmas with ornament exchange
Wednesday- Work, Work Holiday party, get ankle checked out, work out
Thursday- Work, finish last minute holiday stuff
Friday- Christmas Eve (my favorite day of the year!!) go to church, dinner with family, open presents, go to sleep and wait for Santa :)
Saturday-Christmas breakfast with Ron, open presents, go to Ron's mom's house for dinner/presents
Sunday-Stay in Pajama's all day and watch movies and relax (probably work out)


I am kind of tired just looking at this list.  That is a lot of things to get done, but it will be worth it to spend time with family!


SS Update...

1. Attend an hour long fitness class 6 days this week.

So, my sprained ankle slowed me down, but it didn't completely deter me from getting any activity in (thanks to everyone who gave me ideas about other activities I could do), but I definitely didn't get this accomplished they way I thought I would.  Does that mean I am going to quit and just consider it a loss?  No way!  I am determined to keep going.  I know that I have a long way to go still and this was just a small bump in the road. 

2. Get all of my holiday decorations out and Christmas presents wrapped.

This is a work in progress.  I still have wrapping to do, but my decorating is pretty much done, so it isn't like I have been totally slacking :)

New Goals... 

1. Stay on track, keep my eye on the prize.

Keep tracking my food, keep up on my activity, stay away from the holiday food.  Should be easy, right? :)

2. Relax.

This is often a struggle for me.  I am a go, go, go type of person.  I know that I stress out too much, it is something that I really need to work on.  I need to just relax and enjoy this season and my time with my family and friends.  Sometimes things don't go EXACTLY as planned, but usually everything turns out in the end.  I am going to really try to master the art of letting things be and just enjoying my life and living in the moment with the people I love.

Saturday Session

I am writing to you from a place that just got 18 inches of snow dumped on it.  A place that is known to be frigid and snowy.  A place that is very close to Canada, but today feels like it is bordering the North Pole or Antarctica.  I have lived here my entire life.  I love it here.  There is nowhere else I would rather be (except Italy <3)  I love having four full seasons to enjoy.  I am someone who hates weather when it is super hot and muggy.  I like being bundled up in the cold weather.  I am someone who strongly believes that you are only allowed to complain about one season.  You either like the heat or you like it when it is cooler.  I must say, I prefer a cool crisp autumn day to most any other day. As I said before (and I promise this will be the last time) I hate being hot! So if one must choose between being hot or cold I choose to be cold.  Having said that, this next statement is going to contradict everything that I just said, but here it goes... I HATE this bitterly cold, blizzard filled, snowed in day I wish that the blizzard didn't come today and ruin my three very fun plans that I had this weekend.

Okay, I feel much better and more prepared to move on with what this post is actually supposed to be about, which is not complaining about the weather (but seriously if you looked outside and what you were feasting your eyes on had ruined your wonderful and fabulous weekend filled with family, friends and cookie baking you may be upset too).  Just sayin'.


Last time I had a Saturday Session post it was about the topics listed below.

1. Attend an hour long fitness class 6 days this week.

I made these goals the Saturday after Thanksgiving and I actually rocked at this the entire next week.  After that I got engaged, had an interview and got stuck in a blizzard.  All excuses?  You betcha.  Do I need to work harder at this?  Definitely.  This week working out was not high on my priority list.  I am not even going to try and make more excuses than the ones that were previously listed.  I disappointed myself and I need to do better, so this will be another goal for me for two straight weeks, with an added twist.  I must attend will attend an hour long workout class 6 days a week for two consecutive weeks and I will also take a Spin class and the Mixx at least once each.  Why is this a big deal?  Because I have made plans to go to these classes at least 5 times before and when I get there I see very fit skinny people who look extremely coordinated and more capable of completing this class than me and I run away to my comfortable elliptical and watch music videos of fit celebrities and kick myself for being such a baby.  That may have been the longest run-on sentence.

2. Get all of my holiday decorations out and Christmas presents wrapped.

I realize now that I am looking at this goal that this may have been me taking the easy way out and posting something that brings me immense joy and not really something that is a goal that I was working towards.  However, I was very successful with this goal and my house is beautifully decorated and lovely. 

My festive wine rack withe the stockings hung.

Ron carefully decorating the tree.

Our tree!

New goals...

1. Attend a one hour workout class 12 times in the next 14 days.  Also attend a Spin class and the MIXX at least once.

This scares me.  I hope I can succeed at this.  I will feel amazing if I am able to accomplish this.

2. Get back on track.  

What I mean by this is I kind of stopped tracking my food.  I did alright most days, but then one day I ate two handfuls of M&M's.  It was a slippery slope and I am not falling for it anymore.  Tracking every day is essential for me and is something that I need to get back into.

I will post blizzard pictures tomorrow after we reconcile from our fight.  Have a great evening everyone. Hope you're staying on track with all of the holiday temptations.  It is hard, but it will be worth it when we are well ahead of the game when everyone just begins to make their new year's resolutions. :)

My inner thoughts on blast

Happy Sunday!  Tomorrow it is back to work.  I am actually excited about this.  Which is weird, I love the weekend, but I only have to work 1.5 days this week and then I am off for the rest of the week for Thanksgiving.  I love Thanksgiving and I love hosting and planning holiday events and this year my Mom and I are hosting Thanksgiving at her house.  My mother is a fabulous cook and baker and a great hostess and party planner.  I would like to think that I inherited these traits.  I am not quite as expert as she is, but I would say that I am advanced in my party planning abilities.

I am excited and also nervous.  I am anxious and relaxed.  Who am I kidding?  I am like a chicken with my head cut off.  Not only am I planning this event with 45 people and making a pie for the first time from scratch including the crust.  I am also in the middle of a lifestyle change.  I am like over-analyzing, over-planning, triple checking, making a list and checking it twice.  You see, in my normal environment that I am in complete control of I am great.  I have gotten this healthy living, eating, breathing, sleeping and exercising thing down to a science.  When I am a fish out of water?  I am likely to flop around like a state fair carnival booth prize winning goldfish in a first-graders bedroom. No, I won't be.  I CAN'T be out of control.  I am in control of myself, my actions, my body.  BLAH. If I have lost some of you with this tirade I don't blame you at all. In fact if you are off reading another blog that is not nearly so full of anxiety I also don't blame you.

I just spent $106.77 at the grocery store buying groceries for the next two weeks of my life including the pecan pie and sweet potatoes that I am making.  I bought a lot of amazing new products that I am dying to try and some tried and true items that I can't live without (see tomorrow's post on Must-have items).  I just spent the better part of an hour washing, cutting and bagging up my food for the week and making  pile in the fridge of items for work for Monday and Tuesday and a pile of stuff to take to my Mom's with me. I have planned every meal, I have planned every work out.  This may seem crazy, but for me it has to be this way right now.  I can't allow myself to just go home, where it is comfortable and my mom makes homemade deliciousness out of the oven all day and there is no gym membership and think that my new jeans that I can now buckle and wear without turning blue in the face from cutting off my circulation will fit.  You see, I have done great so far.  I am 45 pounds down since October 2nd and I am proud of it.  I have lost weight in places that I didn't think was possible.  I have tried classes that I swore were too hard for me.  I have gone to happy hour and ordered nothing deep fried and had a water.  I have not had a drop of alcohol or soda for 7 weeks.  My body is sharp, cleansed, getting healthy and getting fit.  I have come too far to go back.  I have seen some small successes and dreamt of greater ones.  I have lost 45 pounds and I will not gain one pound back.  Not this holiday or the next.  I am in control and I make my own decisions. I will eat in moderation, I will not go back for seconds and I will stay on track and make it to the end of this journey. I am not a fish out of water.  I am Nemo finding my own way in a sometimes scary and unpredictable world.