Worst time of the day



I am not a morning person, so you would probably think that the worst time of the day for me would be 6:00 a.m. when my alarm goes off.  While that is true, the worst time of the day for me is by far the evening after work.  Monday through Friday 8-4:30 I am the queen of healthy eating.  I avoid bad foods at work all day, I make sure I eat my healthy meals and snacks and I drink a ton of water.  When the clock strikes 5:00 and I am almost home it is like a switch turns on. 

There are advertisements on the radio for food.

There is a basket of candy for treak or treaters at my house.

There is a bag of nacho cheese doritos in my cupboard.

There is a coupon for chinese food in my mailbox.

There is my brain telling me that one night of deliciousness can't really be that bad...

So what did I do?  Radio turned off.  Basket of candy put on a high shelf out of sight.  Doritios doused in water and vinegar and thrown away.  Coupon straight into the shredder.  Open up my computer and read some weight loss articles and success stories to remind my brain what the goal is.

Dramatic?  Not really.  It may seem to an outsider that I should just be able to avoid it all, but I am not there right now.  I am at the point where I have to get it away from me or else I will convince myself that one night off track is okay.  I have to get it away from me to reach my goal.  I have to keep going with my 8-4:30 in order to make this weight loss a success.  Does anyone else struggle with this?  Does anyone else have to remove temptation from right under their nose for fear that they will eat an entire basket of candy or bag of chips?  It drives me crazy.  I am happy that I am working through some of these issues with a counselor and I hope that one day soon I can have those things around me and eat them in moderation or avoid them completely, but I am just not there right now.

Right now it is 8:33 a.m. and I am eating a banana and oatmeal and it feels as though the world is my oyster.  I feel like I can accomplish anything.  Like I can resist all temptation.  I plan to ride this feeling out and hope that when 5:00 strikes I am one day closer to kicking these feelings to the curb.

On the Hunt

Does anyone besides me ever get sick of their food?  Not too long ago I thought to myself, "this whole eating thing is going to be a piece of cake!  I will just eat a healthy turkey sandwich with fruit, veggies and some whole wheat chips EVERY DAY!"  Well, I am sure you can guess how that went.  Epic fail.  Nothing should be eaten over and over again, except maybe cake or chocolate :)  So, I have been really trying to break out of the box and try new things.  I love finding new "healthy" products and mixing them in with some staples that I already eat.

I must say that I am sort of a brand loyalist.  I find something I like and I stick to it.  For example you will catch me only buying Jif Peanut Butter, Heinz Ketchup, French's Mustard and Miracle Whip.  I grew up eating these items and I will not buy another brand of this product no matter what.  Having said that, I do have certain "healthy" items that I really like, but for the most part I am willing to stray if I find something intriguing once in awhile.

I was shopping around  the other day and I found a "healthy" fruit snack.  I know what you're thinking, "that doesn't exist."  I swear though that these fruit snacks ARE different and they taste really, really good.  The brand is called Buddy Fruits and the type of snack is called Pure Fruit Bites.  They are 100% real fruit and in fact the orange flavor had a full serving of fruit in it.  I brought a package in to work so that my co-workers could try them and everyone loved them.  Several of my co-workers said they would ditch their kids old fruit snacks and would be picking up some of these instead.  I am not eating the fruit snacks to replace eating real fruit, but sometimes you just want a snack and this is something that I don't feel guilty grabbing on the go to tide me over*.






* Buddy Fruits didn't pay me to write this post, I just really like their product and wanted to share it with all of you. :)

And the mystery ingredients are...

Brussel Sprouts

On my quest to try new vegetables and fruits every week I decided that there was no better time than the present to try brussel sprouts.  I can honestly say that I have never tried them.  I don't know much of anything about them really other than the fact that it seems as though you either love them or hate them.  It comes from the cabbage family, it is a leafy green color and it contains vitamin A&C, folic acid and dietary fiber.  Good enough benefits for me to eat it.  So I started thinking about how to prepare this for the first time and I wondered if anyone has any good recipes?  I hear that people steam them, bake them, boil them and even chop them up and throw them in salads and pasta!  So adventurous!



Mango

My new fruit of the week (which isn't "new" because I have had it) is mango.  I have had mango before, but it isn't somthing that I usually buy, so I decided to grab a few since they were on sale.  I am trying to break out of my current habit of buying apples, bananas and grapes.  There is so much more in this world than those 3 fruits and I am determined to try as many as possible.

Lunches for the week are salads galore.  Packed with proteins (egg, grilled chicken), more veggies (carrots, slaw, onion, peppers, tomato) and a dash of vinigrette.  I am really excited to be doing a mixture of salads. I have realized that I usually eat a heavier dinner, so I am trying to keep lunches lower in carbs to balance out my evenings.  I do think its important to have a mixture of carbs all day long.  It makes me feel icky when I just eat vcarbs late at night and then go to bed.  Yuck!

Recent food temptations fought: buffalo chicken pizza, donuts and potato wedges. I decided I am going to try to turn my temptations into reality somehow, so I am bound and determined to make a healthy spin on buffalo chicken this week, so be on the look out for that.  Happy Tuesday!

Eating my Feelings

I have always said that I just really like food.  I love the smell, the taste, the texture.  I love the way it can remind me of a time or a place or just make me feel satisfied.  Whenever people would say you have to figure out why you eat what you do and what triggers it.  I would kind of silently laugh inside and think, "I eat because I like food. period. end of story."  Well, while I still maintain that I do just love food, I know that isn't the whole truth.  I mean I have known for awhile that it wasn't the whole truth, but yesterday it became extremely obvious that I, like many other people eat my feelings/emotions at times.

I know this may not seem groundbreaking to any of you.  I am overweight and admitting that I eat my emotions at times.  Okay...?  That seems obvious, right?  I think in some ways it might be obvious, but I think until you actually catch yourself doing it you can pretend like it isn't happening.

Yesterday I had a great morning.  I started out my day with a work out.  I came to work and everything was just fine.  I ate my lunch of soup and a salad and I remember feeling satisified and full.  I went to work at the front counter at my work, which I hate and my day started to spiral downwards.  The front counter is busy, overwhelming, fast-paced and people are generally NOT happy or pleasant to you.   Yesterday was all of these things on over-drive followed by an argument with a friend.  Needless to say I was very quickly in a bad mood.  One of my co-worker's came by to talk to me, but I was too busy.  He could see that I was stressed and on his way back around the building he dropped off a bag of my favorite chips to, "try and make my day a little bit better."

I didn't even really realize it, but before I knew it the bag was open, the smell of spices and chips filled my nose and I was eating the chips.  I ate probably 5 chips before I realized a few things. 

1. I wasn't even hungry.

2. I was eating my emotions.

3. I am angry that a solution to a bad day in my co-worker's eyes is food.

Number's one and two are absolutely accurate.  Number three is frustrating, but I know that he had good intentions.  He knows that I love those chips and he was trying to do something nice.  I can see that, however I wish it was an apple, a high five or just some encouraging words.  I don't need food to make me feel better about my day, mood or emotions.  I don't need chips to make me feel better.  It is a tough realization for me that food isn't just to be enjoyed in any amount or in any form.  I think food should be enjoyable, but the key is to eat the right food for the right reasons.  Of course there will be times when chips, cake, fried food, etc will be eaten, but it shouldn't be because I had a bad day.  It should be to enjoy a special treat every once in awhile and not to drown out the emotions I am having at the time.

Meeting the Priest

                                                     This is where we will be married :)

As most of you know, my fiance and I are getting married in less than one year.  The paper chain countdown has begun! :)  We are getting married at the chapel at my college on October 6th, 2012.  Since it is on the university grounds we have many rules and restrictions about what we can and can't do, which is making the planning process a little more tricky.  In addition to the rules that are imposed we also have to find our own priest to marry us.  This may not sound like a huge issue, but it is kind of a big deal. 


Ron and I have an appointment tonight at a catholic church near our house that we plan to become members at.  We are hoping that Ron can be baptized there and that we can do our marriage preparation with the priest there.  I got a good vibe from the community when I visited a couple weeks ago and it is only four blocks from our house, so it seems perfect!  The only thing is that we need to try and see if the priest is willing to marry us at another church, which is what I am really nervous about.

I grew up catholic, it is important for me to get married in the catholic church and I intend to raise my children in the catholic faith.  However, having said that I am not a strict practicing catholic.  There are many things in the catholic faith that I do not agree with.  I don't want to get into what I do and do not agree with because I don't want to air that all out on my blog.  I am hoping that everything goes well tonight with the priest and that we can start to move forward with our marriage preparation.  It is sometimes crazy to think that at this time next year I will be married.

We have managed to book our church, reception venue and photographer, but we still need to book everything else.  I feel like having a 22 month engagement can really distort your wedding timeline.  I was really good at the beginning about planning things and then we bought the house, and had five weddings this summer and well you know... life gets busy!

On the weight loss front things are slow, but losing.  It was only about a pound a week during September, which was my own fault entirely.  I wasn't walking the walk at all.  I was giving it a really poor shot.  This month has been much better already.  Avoiding temptation, watching portion control and eating only when i'm hungry.  I have been upping my workouts too, which feels great.  I love being hot and sweaty at the gym and then walking outside into the crisp fall air.

Well, wish us luck tonight and cross your fingers that we find the right priest to marry us :) Hope everyone is having a happy, healthy fall day!

Healthy Fall Foods

Thank you for all of the kind comments that you left for me.  I really appreciate your support.  I decided to continue to post on my blog because it helps me work through many things in my life and it is one of the outlets that I really like to help me with this weight loss journey.  I don't want to give this other person anymore time in the light, so i'm going to leave it at that.  Thanks again for your continued support and thoughtful comments!

I was starting out my day as I usually do and opening up my email and I saw an article on MSN that said, "12 Fall Foods for a Flat Belly".  I decided to check it out and I thought I would share it with you.  Check out this article and other great articles about weight loss and health by clicking the link above.  This is not a paid endorsement, I just thought that the articles contained some good information.  I summarized the article below, but check out the real link above for more details and some photos.


1. Pumpkin Seeds- provide magnesium, antioxidants and fiber.
2. Turkey- great source of lean protein if you ditch the skin and the dark meat variety.
3. Sweet Potato- this delicious fall treat is full of fiber and helps you stay full longer.
4. Kale- great source of vitamin K (bone strengthening) and low in calories.
5. Brussel Sprouts- packed full of fiber and protein.
6. Cauliflower- low carb starch option.
7. Spaghetti Squash- one of my favorites!  Use in place of pasta and save a ton of calories and carbs.
8. Avocado- as most of us already know avocado's provide a healthy dose of fat to our diet.
9. Apple- this fruit is also full of fiber.  Make sure not to choose an apple that is too large or you will end up with more sugar than you want in one sitting.
10. Fig- this little guy packs a big calcium punch for those of us who are lacking in that department.
11. Pomegranate- chalk full of antioxidants, helps boost immunity to colds/flu.
12. Broccoli- the triple threat.  This veggie is stacked with protein, calcium and fiber.


I realized after looking at this list that I have some exploring to do.  I haven't had pumpkin seeds since I was a kid, so I will make some of those at the end of the month.  I don't make sweet potato's enough, so that is on my to do list as well.  I have never eaten kale or brussel sprouts, so I suppose now is as good a time as ever :)  Lastly, figs don't excite me, but I am willing to give it a shot.  I will let you know if I try any dishes with these "new to me" ingredients.  Happy Monday!

I Wish...

I wish I wouldn't have let a month go by without telling you all why I was not here.


I wish that I didn't let what happen upset me as much as it did.


I wish that I felt the same way about blogging as I did over a year ago.


I wish that the person who sent me several awful emails would have thought things through before sending them.


I wish I would have just brushed it off and not let it consume me.


I wish these things, but the truth is that wishing is not enough.




About a month ago I got the first of three emails from a reader who was not happy with my comments on this blog.  This person was very upset that I didn't outline everything that I ate every day, pictures of my scale every week and that I didn't ask my readers more about how their journey's were going.


That was the first email.  The second and third emails were ten times worse and honestly, I am not even going to validate the person by explaining it all here, but let's just say that I had to seek the advice of an attorney to figure out what to do next.


I don't want to dwell too much on what happened or the very ridiculous allegations and assumptions that this person was making, because they are unfounded and absurd.  I will say that I am sorry for my absence, that I appreciate those of you who have followed me and offered me support over the past year and a half and that I wish you all continued success and I hope that you all reach your goal(s), whatever they may be.  I think the majority of the people in this blogging community are amazing, inspiring and motivating people and I continue to motivate myself through all of your stories.  For now, I am going to take this blogging thing one day at a time.  I needed to break the silence, since I have gotten a few, "what happened to you!?" emails and I realized that is was rude of me to fall of the face of the earth.


I am not done with my journey or with blogging, but I am taking time to rethink my presence in the blogging community and trying to determine if my words are better suited in a journal rather than in a public forum.  I am still struggling with that notion and I don't expect to have all of the answers right away.  I hope you all understand where I am coming from and realize that we all have to make our own personal decisions based upon what we feel is right for ourselves.  Thanks again for the love and support you have given me all of this time and I hope to be back in some capacity that suits my personal journey.